You have the chance to eliminate the Guppies again tonight. Please do so, because as much as I want to see you in person Sunday night, I don’t want you to lose 2 in a row. You win tonight, and our tickets for the second round can easily be exchanged for some in the conference finals.
Zubie, please don’t try to make any really pretty passes to Patrick Marleau tonight. His birthday is very far away, and it’s not Christmas. I am really glad to see you back, but please play better.
Loui, where did you go, my adorable little Swede? I miss seeing how happy you get when you score a goal. Please start scoring again soon.
Marty, good job so far except it kinda sucks that you’re 0-for-the-playoffs on breakaways. Please keep playing the way you are and slap Zubie if he lets another pass get away.
Brenden, you are the current Conn Smythe winner and my favorite player ever. Please keep doing everything just the way you’re doing it.
Please don’t let this game into overtime and be close. My mom’s favorite score is 4-1, and I’d love to see that because then I might be able to breathe and function like a (semi) normal human during the game.